Battle of the unseen
I don't even know what is happening right now. But it is all too familiar. Whenever I take an active step of faith. When I go out of my comfort zone to proclaim my faith or actively pray for people, that's when it happens. This is not the first time. And I know it will not be the last time. I know whatever I am saying will sound crazy to anyone who doesn't believe in the spiritual realm. For those who know the background story, feel free to skip to the present day situation
-Background story-
Friends who know me for awhile would know that I was always interested in the media industry. At 16, after God extended my life, I discovered & chose Ms Michelle Chong as my role model. The 16 year old me had random conversations with her over twitter and started praying for her and other people I followed in the 140 character limit. When I was 17, I was in a totally new environment that wasn't really big on Christianity. It tested my faith - Do I 'act cool' and decline my faith just to fit in with the rest? As I struggled with that, I heard about Siwon Choi, a Korean singer & actor who visited a church in Singapore when he and his group, Super Junior came for a world tour. My life was greatly impacted by Siwon who actively proclaimed his Christian faith. If someone who was so famous could bravely share about his faith. What about me? A nobody? Through him, I got to know about 3rdWaveMusic who brought together Christian singers and organised outreach programmes. Somehow one thing led to another and it led me to my Christian mentor, Uncle A. At that time, I was still praying for Ms Michelle Chong and I remember asking God how exactly should I pray for her? I came across a video by her friend Samuel Seow and she was used as a case study - 'Can fame buy happiness'. She was asked if she was happy after making quite a bit of money after her first movie. She said "she wasn't". When asked what does she think would make her happy, she said "religion maybe.." I used to get notifications whenever she tweeted. At that point, she tweeted something about being depressed. That was the answer. No better timing than that. From then on, my heart had a burden for her. My heart rejoiced knowing that Alexander Lee Eusebio (Xander) was casted for her second movie. I remember sharing with Uncle A, what God showed me with regards with Ms Michelle Chong and I prayed that his son, Xander would get the opportunity to share the love of Christ with her since he will be working with her on set!
Because of my interest in the media industry, the impact of Siwon and my heart's burden for Ms Michelle Chong. I knew that I had a purpose and it was associated with artiste management.
-Skip here for present situation-
I have been having nightmares about work. Things like screwing up various things or unable to prevent my artiste from doing stupid things that would affect his image/market value. I didn't think much about them as they were not as spiritually obvious or threatening as the previous ones. This morning, I just felt prompted to start a day with a prayer on my instagram story. It was a long day of shoot for the first project I had full complete autonomy since I joined the team. The prayer went something like that.
"Heavenly Father, I entrust this day to you. May I be filled with your joy & peace as I go around. Help me be a blessing to the people around me and teach me to surrender completely to you. I pray for the person reading this, that they will be protected and safe from harm. I commit this day into Your hands. In Jesus name we pray, Amen!"
I know it is going to sound crazy. But throughout the day, I had this uncomfortable feeling in my soul. I did not think much of it and pushed the uncomfortable feeling aside but it started building up and just moments ago my soul felt so oppressed. I felt so helpless, couldn't help but just pour out in tears knowing that I've to call out to God and chill out with worship songs.
I started putting pieces together. That was when it hit me really hard. I am not able to put that feeling into words but whenever I take an active step of faith with resolve or take a step towards God's purpose for my life, the evil one gets scared and attacks. Thinking that fear would stop me from doing God's work. But I know, God is so much stronger. He has brought me thus far, allowed doors to open for a reason and He would not leave me now. May all that I do glorify God and be a blessing to others.
Heavenly Father, thank You for always loving me. Father, I do not pray that You will take this away from me, but build me up and strengthen me in my faith that I can continue to touch the lives and shine for You, overcoming all the obstacles the evil one may put in place. Knowing that You are God alone and will provide all my needs.
In Jesus name we pray,
Amen
God's love & blessings~
Xoxo
Marissa
-Background story-
Friends who know me for awhile would know that I was always interested in the media industry. At 16, after God extended my life, I discovered & chose Ms Michelle Chong as my role model. The 16 year old me had random conversations with her over twitter and started praying for her and other people I followed in the 140 character limit. When I was 17, I was in a totally new environment that wasn't really big on Christianity. It tested my faith - Do I 'act cool' and decline my faith just to fit in with the rest? As I struggled with that, I heard about Siwon Choi, a Korean singer & actor who visited a church in Singapore when he and his group, Super Junior came for a world tour. My life was greatly impacted by Siwon who actively proclaimed his Christian faith. If someone who was so famous could bravely share about his faith. What about me? A nobody? Through him, I got to know about 3rdWaveMusic who brought together Christian singers and organised outreach programmes. Somehow one thing led to another and it led me to my Christian mentor, Uncle A. At that time, I was still praying for Ms Michelle Chong and I remember asking God how exactly should I pray for her? I came across a video by her friend Samuel Seow and she was used as a case study - 'Can fame buy happiness'. She was asked if she was happy after making quite a bit of money after her first movie. She said "she wasn't". When asked what does she think would make her happy, she said "religion maybe.." I used to get notifications whenever she tweeted. At that point, she tweeted something about being depressed. That was the answer. No better timing than that. From then on, my heart had a burden for her. My heart rejoiced knowing that Alexander Lee Eusebio (Xander) was casted for her second movie. I remember sharing with Uncle A, what God showed me with regards with Ms Michelle Chong and I prayed that his son, Xander would get the opportunity to share the love of Christ with her since he will be working with her on set!
Because of my interest in the media industry, the impact of Siwon and my heart's burden for Ms Michelle Chong. I knew that I had a purpose and it was associated with artiste management.
-Skip here for present situation-
I have been having nightmares about work. Things like screwing up various things or unable to prevent my artiste from doing stupid things that would affect his image/market value. I didn't think much about them as they were not as spiritually obvious or threatening as the previous ones. This morning, I just felt prompted to start a day with a prayer on my instagram story. It was a long day of shoot for the first project I had full complete autonomy since I joined the team. The prayer went something like that.
"Heavenly Father, I entrust this day to you. May I be filled with your joy & peace as I go around. Help me be a blessing to the people around me and teach me to surrender completely to you. I pray for the person reading this, that they will be protected and safe from harm. I commit this day into Your hands. In Jesus name we pray, Amen!"
I know it is going to sound crazy. But throughout the day, I had this uncomfortable feeling in my soul. I did not think much of it and pushed the uncomfortable feeling aside but it started building up and just moments ago my soul felt so oppressed. I felt so helpless, couldn't help but just pour out in tears knowing that I've to call out to God and chill out with worship songs.
I started putting pieces together. That was when it hit me really hard. I am not able to put that feeling into words but whenever I take an active step of faith with resolve or take a step towards God's purpose for my life, the evil one gets scared and attacks. Thinking that fear would stop me from doing God's work. But I know, God is so much stronger. He has brought me thus far, allowed doors to open for a reason and He would not leave me now. May all that I do glorify God and be a blessing to others.
Heavenly Father, thank You for always loving me. Father, I do not pray that You will take this away from me, but build me up and strengthen me in my faith that I can continue to touch the lives and shine for You, overcoming all the obstacles the evil one may put in place. Knowing that You are God alone and will provide all my needs.
In Jesus name we pray,
Amen
God's love & blessings~
Xoxo
Marissa
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