Confusion
There has been a battle going on lately. There comes a point where your faith will be tested. Maybe now's my time.
As many would have realised, I haven't been going to church as much as I would like to. I don't have any excuse for it. I simply just need time away from church. I reminisce the times where I was studying in Perth and seldom had the chance to go to church. It somehow grew my desire for God. Now back in Singapore, (I am going to be brutally honest) I feel suffocated going to church. I find it becoming routine. I feel that I am going because I have to and that's what Christians do. Can too much of something good be bad? That is the question I ask myself.
Don't get me wrong. I am not angry against God or anything. I am also just not angry against anyone in church. I just feel like I need some time to sort this out with God on my own. Without letting the "norms" influence my decisions. I need to rediscover God and sort out my relationship with Him once again. I feel that I have not kept my promise to Him by ministering to people through my blog as I have been missing for quite awhile.
Yes, this may not be something that my Christians brothers and sisters would like to hear. But I am simply sharing how I feel truthfully. I promised myself that I would not sugar coat the things I am going through on this faith journey. The struggles are real, but I would keep holding on to Christ despite the battles happening within.
I know that God is good. Even through these times where I am getting myself sorted out, I know that God will provide guidance and a way out of this. I look forward to getting back to church soon.
God's love & blessings~
Xoxo
Marissa
As many would have realised, I haven't been going to church as much as I would like to. I don't have any excuse for it. I simply just need time away from church. I reminisce the times where I was studying in Perth and seldom had the chance to go to church. It somehow grew my desire for God. Now back in Singapore, (I am going to be brutally honest) I feel suffocated going to church. I find it becoming routine. I feel that I am going because I have to and that's what Christians do. Can too much of something good be bad? That is the question I ask myself.
Don't get me wrong. I am not angry against God or anything. I am also just not angry against anyone in church. I just feel like I need some time to sort this out with God on my own. Without letting the "norms" influence my decisions. I need to rediscover God and sort out my relationship with Him once again. I feel that I have not kept my promise to Him by ministering to people through my blog as I have been missing for quite awhile.
Yes, this may not be something that my Christians brothers and sisters would like to hear. But I am simply sharing how I feel truthfully. I promised myself that I would not sugar coat the things I am going through on this faith journey. The struggles are real, but I would keep holding on to Christ despite the battles happening within.
I know that God is good. Even through these times where I am getting myself sorted out, I know that God will provide guidance and a way out of this. I look forward to getting back to church soon.
God's love & blessings~
Xoxo
Marissa
Comments
Post a Comment